I don't wanna be your hero

And I dream of you just now, I am not sure what got us start talking and you invited me to your place for some cookies or hot drinks. It was raining. When you were preparing the snacks I was browsing around your house, checking all the little decor. We were talking, laughing like good friends. And your mom broke in, shouting at me asking me to get out. I wore my angers and shouted back with teary eyes. You tried to hold her so she won't step forward to hurt me, but she was out of control. I stared at her, looking straight into her eyes. The only sentence I remembered is "You know what? After this guy (then point at you), I won't be able to trust any other guy." as my tears falling down I continued, "You and your son will definitely be regret one day, for treating me like this."

And I woke up, in a very bad mood.

Yes, you guys will be regret of this, but I am not saying I will plan on revenge or anything. It just that after years when you guys look back, you guys should know this is wrong to get rid of a girl in that way. It's actually alright to let me go, you know? I have told you that if you are struggling between me and your parents, then just choose your parents. You only have one parents, but you still can have other girl as your wife. I have told you, if you are leaving me because of this I wouldn't blame you.

And I have found this song through a kdrama named "It's Okay, That's Love" this is so far my favorite kdrama by this year. And this OST touches my heart. This is special as we seldom have English song in kdrama.

I thought of you when I listen to it. It even fits our situations. You see, imagine you are the guy who is singing this song, who says you want me to let you go as you need to chase your dream. I can't help but feel guilty.

Back then I was too controlling. Guess it is the results of your betrayal and I have lose the sense of security in this relationship. From that time on, I don't know how to love. I was too sensitive and anxious, I can say I don't develop any trust on you no matter how hard I have tried. All the plans are ruined, you just can't make it but still I believe you should do it in my way.

You are just a kid, not a hero that I want.

And now, you are free to fight for yourself, maybe you are still under your parents' control, but at least not me. I wish, you would be free from their wish, hope or any expectation. I know they are too much. You just don't live as your own self but it is more to a puppet. This is what I see from my point of view. No offense please.

Perhaps I couldn't forgive your parents, I don't think I will ever put down. However, I wish you the best in persuading your dream.