Lately, due to Chinese New Year, there are many people asking me about my ex, because we shared the same social circle even though I tried to not mingle with them anymore. I don't see the point of having a lot of friends who can't understand me and keep talking at my back so yea.
People discuss, when they don't know you entirely, they easily disclose things to third party who don't know you at all. I mean, I do discuss, I know how people discuss, I have seen and done it before so I know.
I really don't have to try so hard getting people's approval for these rumors. So yea, I didn't join those celebrations, I didn't join those crowds of "When are you graduating? Where are you now? Where are you going to stay after graduation?". If I know I am going to have these conversations, I would rather not join.
Yes, this world is all about network, I don't have a good network, because I am too arrogant to make networks, I am too lazy to maintain it, or to ask people out when I know they are all busy and they will reject me.
And the ex, ha, I have heard some other things that make me really happy. I didn't know he would still ask about me in front of our friends, I feel funny.
I never ask about him from any of my friends, I would answer if they bring up but I am really not interested to know anything about him. Not how his mom guarded him at Australia, not how he is still single now, not how he gain weight. Please, I am happy with my life now so stop bringing him up.
People have been telling to forgive him to let go, we can still be friends, it was not his fault. Oh really? Not his fault? Okay, you told me he got what he deserved as he was suffering between me and his mom and it was really hard. Fine. Then how about his betrayal? How about he flirted with his ex when he was with me? How about he told his ex he love her when we argued? How about he deleted conversation of another ex? How about he had feeling towards another girl in Australia? How about he cheated me he said he will be sleeping instead he went out? How about all these?
Not his fault? Nope. Hell no.
We both were hurt, but I don't deserve it too. He stepped into my social circle and he knows those are my friends, we are very close, and he still step into my social circle. Yes, you could say he is just trying to make friends but there is no need to make friends with my friends when you have bunches of friends out there. I don't like seeing you mingle with my friends okay?
Because they will tell me about how are you but I really have no interest for that. You and your mom have been doing a good job keeping all the rumors up in this small town, You really want to get rid of every single friends of mine then you will stop?
I regretted, a lot.
They told me I was in love so I shouldn't blame on you, yes I have fault too, being too controlling being too emotional being to harsh on you. But if people have eyes, they know, these only happens after your betrayal. Only after your betrayal. ONLY happen after I saw you said "I do" for her question of "Do you love me?"
I let go of the part how he treated me, how his mom treated me, how they let the rumors fly. But I am very sorry that I could not forgive you messing with my friends and still act innocent.
